Communication Insights

The  surprising thing about how people evaluated me turned out to be that they both rated me as a people oriented person. Even more surprising then that is that my own rating of myself was people oriented. This funny because I see myself more of a content-oriented person who listens for pertinent information when listening to someone.

Insights about communication I have learned this week

• Affect is significantly important.

• How someone says something is considered more important than what they actually said in some circumstances.

• Communication is not easily accomplished, cultural clashes make it difficult to communicate with others.

 I had the opportunity to participate in an honest discussion with an authority figure. We constantly kept clashing, not in an argumentative way but, through our different cultural perspectives. When the person I was communicating with would say something I would perceive and interpret it differently than how she originally intended and when I communicated something she would perceive and interpret it differently than I intended. Sadly, I felt that nothing was being accomplished as if my words were a foreign language to her ears. Will keep trying.

Communication within a culturally diverse family

I choose to look at the diversity within my family. Within the last ten years my immediate and extended family has changed dramatically. There are different religions represented, varying abilities, various socio economic backgrounds, different levels of education, and various races represented within in my family. Based on what I have learned this week three strategies I could use to help me communicate more effectively with them would be:

1.)    Remember that even family members have different cultures than I do, and that their cultures shape the way they communicate.  Beebe, Beebe, & Redmond (2012) state, “Even if people appear to be like you, all people are not alike. You must take the time to explore a person’s background and cultural values before you can determine what you really have in common” (Beebe, Beebe, & Redmond, 2011, p.102).

2.)    Being open to new ways of thinking and viewpoints that other people in my family have.

 

3.)    Allowing people the freedom to express themselves in the way they feel most comfortable; without judgments.

 

Reference

 Beebe, S. A., Beebe, S. J., & Redmond, M. V. (2011). Interpersonal communication: Relating to others (6^th ed.). Boston, MA: Allyn & Bacon.

Are you listening?

I choose to watch a show called Hot in Cleveland. In watching the show with no sound I was able to see that the show was about four women who lived in the same house. I did not think the relationship between these women was a relationship based off of being relatives. Within the show the four women seemed to be dealing with issues within their personal lives that they would share with each other. Through their nonverbal behavior I detected that one of the women was in a friendly relationship, with a man, but she wished could have been more, another women in the show was an admired someone I thought could have been her boss, the third woman was dressing like a young teen and seemed to always be upset (her face was angry a lot) and the last woman was older I did not think of her a grandmother to the other three but thought that she could have been a friend.

When I watched the show with the sound on I was able to see that the first woman was interested in forming a relationship with a man who happened to be her co-worker. The second woman did in fact admire the man she was talking to but he was not her boss he was a fellow co-worker. The third woman who dressed young was going back to college and was not angry but was frustrated at not being able to fit in with the younger students on campus. And the last woman was indeed not the grandmother but was a friend to all the women in the house. I am still unsure if the relationship between the women was one of relation.

If I would have watched a television show that I already knew it would have been easy to assume that I knew what a particular character was feeling since I would be familiar with that character.

While I was able to pick up much information from their nonverbal behaviors I still needed clarification to what some were feeling. What I have learned from this experience is that knowing what someone feels does not only come from watching their behaviors but also truly listening to what they have to say.

Competent Communication

In thinking of someone that demonstrates competent communication, I choose to look at Oprah. The behaviors that she exhibits which make her an effective communicator are, her focused attention on the issue and person who is speaking, her interaction with the person communicating by asking clarifying questions so that there is understanding, her confidence as she speaks with others and her ability to listen beyond just the words someone may be expressing.

I think that modeling some of my communication behaviors after her would be benefit for me as it would allow me to communicate with others where we both leave with a understanding or meaning of what it is we are truly attempting to communicate rather than just feeling as if so many things were not explained or left unclear.